YOUTH MATTERS: Solitude is best shared

By Sam Clear, Director of the Office of Youth Evangelisation

It may initially sound like an oxymoron, that solitude is best shared, but there is a distinct difference between solitude and loneliness. There can be great joy in solitude, but the lack of it is a defining characteristic of loneliness.

And just as being alone all the time, not wanting to socialise, can be a strong indication of hurt or woundedness, the opposite is also true – continually filling our time with noise, avoiding being alone with our thoughts, or with God, is very telling.

I’m an introvert and I have very happily spent a lot of time in my own company, whether hiking overseas or building my house on the side of mountain, but a truth grew slowly out of the many years of doing this; I love walking or working alongside a close friend, especially where very little is said.

In short, to be with someone else who is also enjoying the solitude. I first noticed this sense while walking through South America and upon seeing spectacular views I suddenly longed for a few close friends to be there to see that same beauty.

A few weeks ago a small number of young adults gathered at the Carmelite Monastery in Launceston to learn about the Carmelite way of prayer and religious life. Within the foundations of Carmel there were some glowingly beautiful truths.

Mother Teresa Benedicta shared the history of the Carmelites and those seeking solitude in the caves of Mt Carmel, not simply to be alone, but to be with God. My mind went to 1 Kings 19:1-18, where Elijah is invited by God to stand outside his cave as He passes by.

God is not in the storm, the earthquake, or the fire, but in an inaudible whisper. It made perfect sense then when Mother noted that one of their spiritual Fathers is Elijah! The monastery is a created desert within busy civilization; solitude. And yet within that desert they retreat into an oasis, where both prayer and community are balanced intricately.

In our own lives, where is the created space for solitude, for time to be alone with God and to rest in His silence? Just to be. To contemplate love. And who can we walk with into that desert to help one another along the journey and to share the beauty we have encountered? Solitude is best shared, and it’s firstly best shared with Jesus.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)

This will be my final ‘Youth Matters’ piece. For the past four years I have been working two jobs, averaging between 50 and 80 hours a week between them. The time has come to hand the Director of Youth Evangelisation role over to someone fresh.

I am incredibly grateful for the opportunity to have walked with so many of our youth, young adults and their amazing families. Thank you! If you’re ever passing through Sheffield on a Sunday, please drop in for Mass in our little church to say hello.